Do you know that on the decorating around the lights in the halls of the paris opera house, there are black and gold drawings of dragons, so little they look like lizards?

In those days I hunted for delightful, beautiful things. But as miss Salome insightfully said, searching for joys only within joys is the road to depression

There isn’t a better place to be depressed than paris though

My brother was with me then

It was always grey and I wore black and I didn’t smile too much

I felt cool and angry but also just actually angry and deeply, painfully, disappointed

I tried to help someone but I wasn’t able to. I tried again and I wasn’t able to. I tried again and wasn’t able to.

I was shocked at how much I cared

I consider myself an ambitious person

I don’t feel ambitious to reach the stratosphere anymore. As if we’re not climbing Mount Everest but reaching the depths of the ocean, depths that have not been reached, much deeper than the mountains are high.

Because even with archievements

We only need to go as far as love can go

No faster than the speed of light

On the coast of Portugal there are the worlds highest waves. They are formed by an even deeper canyon underwater. As the storm waves hit the coast, they fill the canyon and swerve sharply up, creating the 100ft waves. And they have actually surfed those waves can you believe it?

I relate to the way those waves move

In my heart is a canyon no one can see

Carved deep by depression

From the tragedies of my parents

Of my brother

Of things that must be survived

And transformed

into flying